Lest I forget,here is a compilation of my Durga Puja shopping list - the minimum things that I simply MUST buy :
1. One Provogue shirt,size : 42,for an extremely choosy person who has shirts of all possible colours and styles,who doesen't prefer to have two same-colored shirts,and is extremely style conscious - well,definitely the best dressed man I have seen in my life within my circle.
The challenges : a. To begin with,I dont have an idea what colours he likes.I thought since he is fashionable,maybe he would like a pink shirt(aren't those in fashion and well,he doesent have any for sure:)),so I asked him whether he wanted that.He asked me in return " Would u like if u see a guy wearing a pink shirt in office or anywhere?" ...ahem,NO!I would hate it and so I said and that answered the question.So,which color?Dunno...
b. In any case, I dont understand shirts for men.I can't make out any uniqueness in any of them, whatever I see, I have already seen it earlier,so what's the point of buying an already-seen shirt?And I simply don't understand why some are so costly when all look and feel the same(to me atleast,for sure).
c. As I already mentioned,the person is amazingly welldressed,stlyish and choosy,ofcourse...yet,he won't give me any suggestion on what he exactly wants,leaves that to my choice though he has never failed to express it on immumerable occasions earlier that when it comes to dresssense,I have the worst!!!Ummm...well,the man in question certainly likes to trouble people , that much I know:)...
d. Last but not the least,I simply want to give him the BEST - is first reaction should be nothing less than a 'Vow'(won't mention this point anymore,please consider it to hold true for all the things I list here)...Easy,eh?
2. One branded leather men's purse : It should not be black,it should not be light brown,it should not be like the one I had given the last time(this,I say on my own!Becos I know he never used that bag!) ,it should not have any chains,but it should have a nice compartment to keep coins and it must be of top quality leather...
The Challenges : a. I have had tried this earlier and my last experience disheartens me.I had bought what I thought was a branded pure leather from Shopper's stop,paid what I thought was a hell lot of unreasonable money ,well,but it wasn't liked I know that :(...
b. In any case,again,who cares about men's purses!My,they all look as boring as every other one!CAN YOU FIND ANY DIFFERENCE between one and the other???I swear I can't and anyone who can,I shower my respects on him/her!
c. I dunno of any other brand other than HiDesign and HiDesign sounds too costly to me!And I don't understand leather.
3. Two pairs of Pearl bangles : Pink ones.
The Challenges : a. The size of the hand I am not very sure of.Ok,these hands have cared for me forever and have brought me up,but still,I don;t know the exact size!When I asked,I was told "bring the maximum size possible"...but that answer doesnot satisfy me atall.It is just too relative and vague!
b. The color of the pearls should match the color of a pink pearl necklace I had bought an year-and-a half earlier.Do I need to say,I don't really remember the color!Was it the peach one or the deeper pink variety?and with so many varieties of pink in Hyderabad,well,what a simple task I have!
c. Certain other challenges which you will get to know as you read on.:)
4. Current Best seller books ,preferably thrillers .
The Challenges : a. Well,only one.She has again and again instructed strictly to buy as many as possible but ONLY second hand ones.Well,ok.Recent best sellers.Thrillers.and Second hand!Vow,easy combo!
5. Unknown???No demand.But...I want to buy something!But should I buy something from Hyderabad or maybe later in Calcutta?More importantly,what do I buy?Ahhh,forget it.
6. Some 3-4 pearl necklaces.
...My family.When I think about them,I can't help smiling!Take my word for it,they are amazingly interesting,if not for anything then for their sheer diversity which meets at only one point - their quirkiness!Doesen't the above shopping list give an idea?Ok,let me give an example.
I asked each one ,precisely, my dad,my ma and my dear BIIIG brother what he/she wants for puja.Well,each one's answer were as expected,true to their nature :)
Letz start with the funniest of them all - MY MOM!When you ask her,"Ma,tomar jonyo ki anbo?""Wat do you want me to get for you?" ,first reaction will be "Oh Nothing,I have everything!" you insist,so,second reaction "Bring whatever you want" .If you r wise,you cut the conversation there and never broach the topic again.But then,we r not wise children :))...so,"Ma,nothing specific then,can i buy a sari then?" and I hold my breath coz I know what comes next-TROUBLE!
Ma : No,no,no.No saris for me .not atall.I have too many of them.Ok...can you buy <
>.This time,for me the surmon is the pink pearl bangles and yeah,the books.
U don't really think it is that difficult ,do u?Ok,read on.Last year,I had bought her a pink pearl necklace,she had desired it for long.I go home and hand it to her -
I : "Ma,do u like it?"
Ma : "Oh ya it is good".(I am relieved and happy).(Then after 5 minutes)."Koel,didn't you get a deeper shade of pink?This colour is too light,isn't it?Wat do u think?"(ok,I buy and now I have to also opine against it!)
My bechara brother.Travelling in different countries,he faces greater problems!
He is coming back from Germany and asks ma the same question.Ma gives the same initial reactions and then drops this bomb- no jewellery,no artifacts,not even a German knife but , A cuckoo clock from Germany!Do u know,what a cuckoo clock is?Well,u might have heard,but trust me it is not that easy!It is a kind-of rare handicraft in Germany ,you don't get it everywhere,only in specific markets/shops...and well,it COSTS!!!So my dear brother searches helter-skelter(remember,they dont speak a lot of English in Germany) to fulfil Ma's desire...finally gets one which is the smallest(about 6 inches) and costs reasonable- 5000 in Indian rupee :).Cuckoo clocks are kinda fragile,so he packs it with great care,and finally,brings it home.We ALL are simply overawed by it,it is so cute and fragile and totally handoperated (which means,you have to pull its chord everyday to keep it running),we search the net for manuals on how to operate the pendulum in right speed and finally with a lot of trials we SUCCEED!!!YEY!!!!THE cuckoo clock is installed on the wall...Now,Ma's reaction?Initially,"Oh.isn't it a bit too troublesome?",After installation "Oh,u mean you have to wind it everyday???".Later,whenever I express my awe for the clock(well,I still believe it is a wonder!),Ma simply expresses that she is not the least interested in the clock,never even looks at it:))well,u must be wondering who takes care of the clock and who keeps it running smooth?Well,DAD ofcourse:)the person who never asked for it takes utmost care for it everyday,and everytime he sees it ,I know he feels a well of love swelling in his heart for his son.:)Oh yes,my brother had brought a white'n'gold swiss wristwatch for her aswell,but she gave it away to me,saying she already has too many watches.This time,I get to hear from my brother what mom has asked him to bring is well,a swiss watch!!!:))Don't get surprised,that's just OUR MOM- one of the most innovative(she is always bustling with new ideas) and funniest persons I have ever met on earth.
Let's move on to the other FLAMBOYANT personality in our family - my dearest BIIIG brother!So,I ask him "Dada,tor pujoy ki chai?","Dada,what do u want from me in the Pujas?"...and well,before I could finish my sentence properly rolls out a long list .A Provogue shirt(and he also mentions proudly,he doesen't wear anything other than branded ones),a "very good" leather purse(the criteria for that already mentioned above), and "well,for trousers..."...I FORCEFULLY cut him there,I just change the topic,otherwise the list wouldnot ever END ,not until before it crosses 10000.So,that's my brother.Anytime you ask him,he rolls out a long list without a moment's thinking but nice thing about him is,if you don't ask him,he never thrusts the list to you,choice is yours:)...But,my,he is choosy,even snobbish when it comes to dressing/things!No,he is not like mom.When you give him something,he will accept it with a smile,even mention that he likes it.But,soon you get to know better :( he won't ever use it...and sometime later,maybe he will ask for the same thing again!!!It happened this time , I had given him a purse on his last b'day :(...Last April ,I was just going home without any occasion and,I had asked very casually whether he wants something and well,the list went like this "A sherwani","Pearl buttons","A box"(he has a fetish for boxes,and whenever he feels like it,he adds this item to his list:))...and that's the point when I changed the topic :))...The Sherwani,which is a HUGE thing and weighs probably 2/3 kgs :))and costs around 2k,buying simply that exhausted me and I didn't care to get the other things in the list :)dunno whether he really liked it or not,will keep an eye if he ever wears it.
Finally,my dad who is a as boring personality as me.Yes,you can raise ur eyebrow if u r my friend at my mentioning me as a boring person,I am talkative and funny and vibrant u think,eh?Come to my family and you wont take even 5minutes to conclude in that colorful world of personalities ,I and ny good ol' dad are the most boring personalities ;)....just example this.I ask dad,what he wants for puja.He laughed a lot,and very affectionately exclaimed "Me!What do I want?" I insist,and he says ok he will think about it and let me know.And from his voice,it was very apparent that he felt very happy at just my offer.He has never asked anything from brother also.Now,does this quite fit in our family?Well,but that's dad.
I know this post is getting very long and I need to wind it up.But whenever I start speaking about my family,I just can't stop,there's just SOMUCH to say...today,I just wove the smallest example possible showing their diversities reacting to the same situation...if you ask me,this is not even the tip of the iceberg,their quirkiness is just unending!
Sometimes,I do get irritated by them,but even then,I just can't help loving them deeply,no,NOT just becos,it's my family,I love them,blah blah blah.Rather becos,I get amused by them all the time - in all their activities,reactions,actions ,they r stupendously funny and endearing and who doesen't love funny people???Come and meet them once,don't take them for their words,see them with the eyes I see,and I promise you,you will end up laughing so hard that it will be a challenge to hold your tears back :)Wanna try?
